through chaos as it swirls (it's us against the world)
by daisymeadowss
Summary: It felt personal, with those anonymous Aglionby boys implying what they were implying - that she was somehow romantically, or more accurately, sexually, involved with all of them, and that it was the only reason they even liked her.


_originally posted on tumblr for the prompt "don't listen to them. don't you EVER listen to them."_

 _warnings for explicit, sexual language._

* * *

"Yeah, there she is. _Look_. Look at her."

"Unimpressive."

"No, really, look at her, she's not even that pretty."

"Barely any boobs at all."

"Nice legs though."

" _Still_ , Floyd, what are you going to grab? You know what I mean? I just, -"

Blue was normally good at tuning out this kind of conversations. It wasn't in her nature to let boys, especially Aglionby boys, get away with making comments like that about her, about _anyone_ , but if she picked a fight with every customer who laughed into their hands when she went to serve them, she wouldn't have a job for long. She had to keep herself cool and professional to be able to collect the nice paycheck she earned at the end of the month. If she was directly addressed - which rarely happened; raven boys were obscene but spineless - she would have a sharp comeback to throw at them, but otherwise she kept her anger to herself. The only thing she did not tolerate was any sort of physical contact, anywhere. She did not hesitate to jump if one of those prep school boys dared to touch her.

Now though, it felt a little different with _her_ raven boys sitting just a few tables away from the other group making lewd comments about her. It felt personal, with those anonymous Aglionby boys implying what they were implying - that she was somehow romantically, or more accurately, _sexually_ , involved with all of them, and that it was the only reason they even liked her.

"To tell you the truth, I'm disappointed, I am, I expected more from someone like Dick Gansey, -"

"Hey, would you really turn her down if she offered to give you a blowjob? Yeah, I didn't think so."

One of the boys, a tall blonde with a shit eating grin chuckled. "Maybe they're paying her to suck them off. You know, one by one. From this one to that one. Her mother's the town _psychic_ , I bet that doesn't pay well."

Blue could her the distaste in his voice when he said _psychic_. It ticked her off as much as anything else he said so far. She tried to swallow her anger down but it was like telling the sun not to shine. Her hands were shaking in poorly disguised loathing and in that moment, she remembered why she had sworn to herself all these years that she would stay away from Aglionby boys no matter what. Cialina was giving her looks of sympathy but Blue did not feel better. It only made her humiliation worse. The table in question was seated close to the cashier and every coworker of hers working behind the counter could hear what they were saying about her. They were amused and pitying. It made Blue want to cry, either from rage or shame.

She glanced over at her friends' table. They were seated farther away from the other Aglionby boys and they did not seem to hear the conversation over there. Unaware, Gansey looked like he was giving Ronan a lecture about something who was not paying attention apart from the occasional grunts or eye rolls, Noah was busy flicking food at other customers with Gansey's fork and laughing at their dumbfounded looks, and Adam was quietly engrossed in a paper in front of him. Ronan sporadically turned his head to stare at the boys making fun of Blue, as if he caught fragments of the conversation here and there, but he must have not heard anything concrete because apart from suspicious glances, he did nothing. Blue didn't know if this made her feel better or worse. She did not want her friends to witness her humiliation too but seeing Ronan pummel those boys to the ground would have sure been entertaining.

Suddenly, the same tall blonde guy laughed loudly which drew both Blue's and the boys' attention to him. He was snickering at a piece of paper, passing it to the boy next to him. He was similarly amused and another boy in front of them smirked, holding a click pen in his hand. Blue felt sick.

Cialina returned from the kitchen with the drinks for the raven boys in her hand and Blue, letting her impulses win, stopped her. "No, wait. I'll bring it over."

Cialina chewed on her lip. She looked torn between giving her the green light and stopping her from potentially losing her job. Blue did not care about that at the moment. If she lost her job over this, she might feel regretful tomorrow, but right now, she was going to make a scene. She could feel it in her veins.

"Blue, I don't think it's a good idea, -"

Blue didn't stop to listen, she took the tray from her hands and started towards their table. One of the boys noticed her heading towards them and punched his friend in the arm to alert him. They looked at each other, equally spooked and smug. The third one, the blonde one, was sitting with his back to her and did not see her approaching. He was too busy animatedly gesturing with his hands to see his friends' expressions.

As Blue neared them, he was saying, "I bet she looks good with her mouth full of co, -" and then she took the tray with three iced teas on it and dumped it in his lap. Glass shattered, Mr. Douche gasped in surprise and Blue smirked. She could feel the stares of everyone in the restaurant on them, including Gansey and the boys. She didn't care. As the guy sputtered and cursed and dabbed at his pants with napkins, the other two sitting dumbfounded and silent in their seats, Blue slammed down the now empty tray on their table.

"Enjoy your iced tea."

Gansey found her not even two minutes later outside in the dark, leaning against the building while her heart slowed and her fury slowly disappeared. She figured she was done for the day either way, fired or not, but she wanted to calm down before she biked home. Her family would see right through her in a heartbeat but it would be better if she was not still reeling from the incident tonight. And a part of her she wouldn't acknowledge was waiting for Gansey to come looking for her.

She glanced at him while he settled himself next to her, a little closer than what could be considered friendly. His hand brushed hers between their bodies. She exhaled, looking away, up at the stars.

"You're probably wondering what was that about."

"We don't have to talk about it if you're not comfortable sharing." But she could hear the curiosity in his voice and she figured he would find out sooner or later anyway.

She shrugged. Her fury evolved and turned into sadness. She was not quite sure why she was sad - it was not as though some rich fuckboy's opinion from Aglionby mattered to her at all. But the melancholy was undeniable. She wondered if that's what the whole town thought of them. Probably not, she assured herself - perhaps the school at most.

"They said some… stuff." She shrugged. When she was silent for longer than a few seconds, Gansey took her hand. The warmth of his skin and the feel of his pulse jumping at the contact was comforting and she added, "About me. Us. I mean, all of us," she clarified.

She did not look at him but his voice was carefully devoid of emotion when he asked, "What stuff?"

She shrugged again. She felt she was doing that too much and it was doing the opposite of convincing him she was fine. "That I… that you pay me in exchange for certain services."

Gansey was silent. Blue tore her eyes away from the stars to see his puzzled expression. She rolled her eyes at the realization that she would have to spell it out for him. With annoyance and a bit too much force, she said, "Blowjobs, Gansey. They said you pay me for blowjobs. To give _all of you_ blowjobs."

If it wasn't for her exasperation, she might have been blushing at the mention of blowjobs in the presence of Gansey _while_ holding hands. She was too upset to feel any hint of awkwardness, though.

The way his eyes went wide was almost comical, like a character from a cartoon movie. Then his expression shifted; Blue could pinpoint the exact moment he went from stunned to angered.

"I shouldn't have let it get to me but, -"

" _No._ No, you were right to be angry. I can't believe they would, - well, I can but, -" he trailed off, seemingly unable to properly express his irritation. He took a deep breath and with it went the face of anger, replaced by a calm cool look she was familiar with. He was able to mask his true feelings in less than a second and Blue sometimes wished she had that skill. It would have come in handy tonight.

She exhaled a sigh slowly, letting her eyes fall closed. "God, I'm probably fired. He's definitely going to complain to the manager, and who is he going to side with? Prominent wealthy Aglionby student versus poor, replaceable waitress? Go on, take a pick. It's not hard."

She could hear the bitterness in her own voice. Regret was already beginning to seep in. She felt Gansey's fingers graze her chin and she opened her eyes at the touch. He gave her an earnest look, his voice soothing when he spoke. "I'll talk to your manager. I'll explain what happened. You will not be fired."

He seemed so sure of himself, so confident. Like it was a fact he could guarantee. Blue had the feeling he was capable of buying him off if everything else failed. She wanted to keep her job but not at the cost of Gansey's money. "No, don,'t, -"

"Please, let me make it up to you."

Blue glanced away. He was still holding her chin in his hand and she resisted the urge to melt into his touch. It was becoming harder to deny her longing every day she spent in his presence but night times were the worst. In the darkness, everything felt heightened, everything was different, stronger, amplified; it was all or nothing. And she wanted all of it, all of him.

Staring stubbornly at Gansey's car parked in front of her, following the shape of it with her eyes, she said, "There's nothing to make up for. This isn't your fault."

He stepped closer, too close, their shoulders touching, his breath on her face, his fingertips warm on her skin. She, embarrassingly, gasped at the unexpected closeness. Her gaze slid to his. The smell of mint, his dark eyes and repressed memories bubbling free were beginning to make her feel dizzy with craving. She gulped.

"Hey. They don't know anything. They're not important." He pulled her closer by her shoulders, just a little to see if she was willing, and she let herself fall into his chest, resting her head against him, his hand coming up to cup the nape of her neck. He slowly stroked her hair and she let out a shuddering breath, allowing both of them this moment. The feel of his warm, solid chest against her cheek, the rapid beating of his heart, the sound of his breathing were all beginning to pull her under, way under what was good for her, and she wanted to be swallowed whole and be buried alive in him. She mused what a ridiculous thought that was. Gansey continued, his voice soft and quiet. "Don't let them get to you. Don't listen to them. Don't you _ever_ listen to them. You're so much better than that."

She smiled into his chest and said nothing. Maybe she would allow him to talk to her manager if he promised not to buy him off. Maybe, if she was fired, it was for the best. Maybe Gansey will not die and everything will work out. For a moment she allowed herself not to care about jobs and money and curses and kings and nasty Aglionby boys. The only raven boy on her mind in that moment was the one holding her and it was the most peaceful she felt in a long time.


End file.
